S&F-Peter: The Imperfect Apostle

I think the best way to understand what I need to do to get to receive eternal life in Heaven is to look at the people who came before and are already there.  Who better to look to than the ones that Jesus himself choose, his Apostles.  If we can figure out what Jesus saw in them then maybe, we too, can figure out what to do so Jesus will choose us as well.

Who better to look towards than the one that Jesus choose to lead his Church, Simon Peter.  Afterall, if Jesus choose him to be the rock to build the Church on he must be the perfect example.

A lot is written about him in the Bible, so we do know much about him.  The surprising thing is he was far from perfect.

Peter was one of the Apostles with a family.  I'm sure there were times when he was torn between his responsibilities to his family as to Jesus.  I assume that his wife, whom we know little about, must have known and understood the importance of Jesus to allow Peter to continue in his ministry.  Afterall, behind every great man is an ever greater woman.

The thing I like most about the stories of Peter is his constant struggle with his belief.  You would think that the first Pope was immediately 100% faithful and always ready to defend Jesus.  Based on the bible this was not the case.  Peter was constantly confused by Christ's teaching.  He tried to show his faith, only to fail and to be brought beck by Jesus.  Remember, not only Jesus walked on water but Peter did as well, only to lose his faith and sink into the stormy waters.  Jesus tried to show the duty of his followers was to be a servant by washing his feet at the last supper only to have Peter misunderstand feeling he was unworthy to that treatment from the Christ.  He wanted to be next to Jesus at the Crucifixion, only to deny him 3 times.  Peter was not the perfect follower of Jesus, but he tried.

In the Acts of the Apostles something changed in Peter.  After receiving the Holy Spirit, he, along with the rest of the Apostles became proud of their faith, practicing it in the open.  They, led by Peter, healed countless people in Jesus's name.  And when they were questioned or even persecuted, they were no longer cowered in fear but confident in their convictions, delighted to share in a little of what Jesus suffered.

In Peter's case, he eventually went to Rome.  He was martyred by crucifixion, but feeling unworthy of suffering like Christ he was hung upside down.  His remains are at the foundation of the Vatican, truly the foundation rock of the Church he built in Jesus's name.

What do we learn from Peter?  The thing I get is that Peter was far from perfect.  He tried to understand Jesus, only to miss the point a lot.  He tried to show his faith, only to falter.  I have these same problems.  I don't understand the teachings of Jesus, my faith wavers at times.  But Jesus kept pulling Peter back, giving him another chance.  Jesus allowed Peter to fail, knowing this would make his faith stronger.  Jesus keeps pulling me back as well.  I just hope that eventually, with the intercession of the Holy Spirit, I can confidently proclaim my faith like Peter and the early leaders of the Church.

St. Peter, keeper of the keys to Heaven, rock of the Church, our first Pope-Pray for us.

S&F-Waiting for Healing

 

Today is the Feast of James the Lesser, and he is my inspiration for this post.

In my year with cancer, I have prayed harder and tried to become closer to Jesus and the Church.  I have read the Bible and know of numerous cases where Jesus cured the sick and even raised people from the dead.  Even after he rose to Heaven Jesus, through his followers, continued to heal the sick and lame.  There are stories of miraculous healings to this day from all sorts of ailments.

So why does Jesus, not heal me?  I'm a good guy.  At least I think I am.

Over the last several years I have become engrossed in the series "The Chosen."  It is the story of the life of Jesus and his Apostles during Jesus's ministry and eventually his death.  Admittingly, this is not a retelling of the Gospels, for the sake of the story they have taken some liberties by adding some characters backstories.  They don't refute the Gospel itself, but some of these stories are not in the Bible.  I make an effort to figure out which stories are Biblically accurate and which ones are Hollywood stories.  I do believe that the stories they add do meet the spirit of what Jesus would have done, so I'm ok with those fictional liberties.

One of the people who I really like in the show is the character of James the Lesser (played by Jordan Walker Ross).  He was one of Jesus's original 12 Apostles.  The bible doesn't say much about him other then he was called "The Lesser" to differentiate him from James, the brother of John.  The Chosen made him have a limp (mostly because the actor playing him is disabled).

In one of the season 3 episodes James askes Jesus why he heals everyone but allows him to suffer with his limp.  Jesus (Johnathan Roumie) tells him that he is seen and appreciated by God as he is.  Jesus tells him that having his disability can actually magnify God's goodness in the world's eyes.  It shows God is good even when he doesn't heal us.

Biblically little is known about the life of James.  Tradition tells us he was the first Bishop of Jerusalem, and was the author of the Epistle of James.  He was at the Council of Jerusalem about conversion of Gentiles.  As a witness to the Resurrection he is a pillar of the Church that Paul consulted about the Gospel.  AS Bishop of Jerusalem he was revered for his deep faith and prayer.  He was so respected that his followers took to calling him James the Just.  For fear of his influence he was thrown from the Pinnacle of the temple after refusing to deny Christ.  He miraculously survived only to be stoned and clubbed to death.

I, like James in the show, wish for healing every day.  But I understand that God has a purpose for me and maybe that doesn't include healing.  Maybe it is by my suffering that I can better get his better out.  I don't think my future includes stoning, but I can use him as an example of embracing what Jesus has in store for me.

Little James-pray for me.

St. Jude: The Patron Saint of Desperate Situations and Lost Causes

The feast day of St. Jude Thaddeaus, or more commonly just Jude, was yesterday October 28th.  On the occasion, I decided to learn a little more about him.  One of the 12 Apostles, He was a relative of Jesus-a cousin.  His brother was also one of the 12, James the Lesser.  He is credited with a book of the bible.

Unfortunately, little more is known for sure about Jude after the resurrection.  It is believed he preached the bible in many places following Jesus’s Ascension before dying as a martyr.

He is the Patron Saint of the disparate situations and lost causes.  When I was told I had cancer I felt like a lost cause. In the months that have been a roller coaster of hope followed by periods of pessimism.  There have been times when I felt like a lost cause, worthy of prayers from St. Jude.

“Most holy Apostle, St. Jude, faithful servant and friend of Jesus, I place myself into your hands at this difficult time.  Help me to know that I am not alone.  Please pray for me, asking God to send me comfort for my sorrows, bravery for my fears, and healing for my suffering.”

• So yesterday, at the beginning of chemotherapy, on The Feast Day of St Jude, I prayed directly to him.

• Saying this prayer made me think of all the people in the surrounding rooms, getting their own infusion.  Why should I only pray for my healing? So the next hour I extended my prayer to include them.  

• On the way out I looked back at the hospital and I realized there are hundreds of people in there dealing with their own sufferings.  So the next time I prayed for his intercession I included the whole hospital.

• In the evening I realized that there is much suffering in the world and many people who are more of a lost cause than I am.  I closed out the night asking for St. Jude to comfort all that are suffering.

I will continue to do this, ask for St, Jude’s intercession, but not only for me but for all who through physical pain and suffering feel they are a lost cause.  That they will not only find relief from their ailment, but find comfort through St. Jude and his cousin Jesus’s presence.